Thanks to Paul Joyce for this idea. See his alphabet here. He probably has more clever cinematic reasons for many of his choices. Mine are just my favourite films that I enjoy! 

(I couldn't think of one for Z so I've allowed myself two for S instead...!)

• A - Arsenic and Old Lace
• B - Back to the Future (all of them, but especially 3)
• C - Chicken Run
• D - Dogsville
• E - Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
• F - Fifty First Dates
• G - Gosford Park
• H - The Help
• I - Inception
• J - Jungle Book
• K - The King’s Speech
• L - Last Holiday
• M - Muppet Christmas Carol 
• N - North by Northwest
• O - Ocean’s Eleven (the original)
• P - The Piano
• Q - The Quiet Man
• R - RED
• S - Sister Act / Some like it hot
• T - Temple Grandin 
• U - Unbreakable
• V - Valentines Day
• W - While you were sleeping
• X - X-men
• Y - The Young Victoria
• Z 

Last weekend I went to see Sister Act in the theatre. I’ve wanted to see this show for ages, mainly because I absolutely love the film. It’s one of those films I’ve seen a dozen times (at least!) So I had high expectations for the stage show. 

The show was - well, it’s a mix. In some ways it exceeded my expectations. But in others I was a bit disappointed. Overall though it was a very enjoyable evening. 

The original film plot

In case you’ve not seen the film, I’ll just briefly outline it. A Las Vegas club singer (Delores Van Cartier) witnesses a murder and runs to the police, who hide her in a convent for her protection until she can be witness in the murder trial. Delores instantly clashes with the Mother Superior (who is the only nun in the convent who knows Delores isn’t a real nun). After being hopeless at serving in various other ways the Mother Superior  sends Delores to help out in the convent choir, which is dire (to be polite) 

With her musical knowledge Delores starts to teach the choir, so that listening to them is no longer torturous but very pleasant. However, she doesn’t stop at just teaching them to sing in tune - she wants to bring the joy of music into their performance rather than ‘dull church music’. So she takes modern secular songs of the day, alters the words slightly so that they’re singing about God or to God, and teaches these to the choir - scandalising the Mother Superior, but winning her approval from everyone else. 

Modern music being sung by dancing nuns... well, it soon gets people coming in to see. The church, which had been dwindling to a congregation in single numbers starts to see a revival of sorts as people are drawn in off the streets by the sound of the nuns singing. 

Delores has other effects on the quiet convent. The convent is located in a rough neighbourhood, and the Mother Superior has seen it as her duty to protect her flock - so keeps them locked inside, with barbed wire on the fence. The sisters only go outside the boundaries of the convent when absolutely necessary. When Delores rebels against the Mother Superior’s orders and goes out to visit the bar across the road (finding it hard to keep to a vow of abstinence!) the other sisters follow her. They think she’s going to minister to the drunkards and heathen, and they want to help her! Delores can see that actually these sisters don’t want to be locked away inside a convent just minding their own business and worshipping God - they love people and want to bless them. She campaigns with the Mother Superior for the nuns to be let out, and wins. Suddenly the sisters are out in the community, mixing with all and sundry and doing whatever they can to help. They’re running mother and baby mornings, helping clean graffiti off walls, chatting with the teenagers and building relationships. The church continues to grow - now because of the work which the sisters are doing in the community, not just their music. 

One young nun, Sister Mary Roberts, is not actually a ‘full’ nun yet. I guess she’s a type of apprentice. The arrival of Delores really helps her. She joined the convent because she wanted to dedicate her life to God. Living 24/7 in the convent, a life of just prayer and worship wasn’t seeming to fulfill what she felt called to and she was having doubts. The element of serving and loving others was missing. As the sisters begin to break out of the over-protectiveness of the Mother Superior, Sister Mary Roberts finds her purpose. At the same time Delores encourages her to sing - at the start of the film she has no confidence and she sings as quietly as possible at the back of the choir. Delores spots her potential and works with her to get her to use her voice - a gift from God. One of my favourite moments in the film is when Mary Roberts bursts out in song in exuberant praise, nothing held back - makes me cry every time! 

At the end of the film of course all is found out, and the sisters save Delores from the mob boss trying to kill her. Delores goes back to her old life, but not after having a profound effect on the convent, even the Mother Superior who comes to celebrate the changes; Delores herself is changed, having all her old demons from catholic school swept away and replaced by a new love for the church and worship (and, we hope, God!)

Where the show got it right

This is a top West End show, with amazing stage production, props, scenery - no expense spared. In addition the performers were incredible. The songs were all perfectly performed, and the dance numbers fantastic. As a whole show it could not be faulted. The lead singer playing Delores Van Cartier had an absolutely delicious voice - I could have listened to her all day. The show was set in the 1970’s, as opposed to the ‘90s in the film. A great move, opening the opportunity for great 70’s inspired music and dance moves. 

Where it didn’t hit the spot

I love the film for its message - that loving God is intimately linked with loving people. And also that all music can be for the praise of God (makes me think of the Cliff Richards’ song ‘Why Should the Devil Have All the Good Music?!) 

For me the disappointment came in changes made to the storyline (presumably to make it more stage friendly?), which meant that certain scenes were cut out, and with them these two central messages. 

The plotline of the sisters connecting with the community around them and being to inspire change and healing, well that was just missing. Instead the show concentrated on the music - the nuns singing show tunes meaning ‘more bums on seats’. It became a materialistic storyline; the choir acted like a Las Vegas show, which meant people came to church; that meant the church got more money - so they gold plated their statues, and bought show style lighting equipment, and the nuns upgraded their plain black habits to sparkly purple and gold and silver ones..... It was actually really sad. Instead of Delores’ use of modern music resulting in something ‘worldly’ being taken and offered to God, then the holy act of worship was taken and offered up on the alter of commercialism. 

And Sister Mary Roberts? Well, she still had her doubts. But they were centered more on the fact that she was young and so had never ‘rebelled’ or ‘lived’. She saw Delores’ Las Vegas life and wanted a taste of it, wanted to wear high heeled boots and skimpy clothes and have a wild relationship. In the end she stayed a nun, but one in rebellion, wearing her purple boots beneath her habit. 

At the end of the show, the storyline left me feeling cheated. Once again it showed a cynicism towards religion and faith, the type you get so often in secular media. Which is sad, because that was never the flavour of the original film, which actually respected and celebrated the life of faith, when lived to the fullness of the story. 

My overall verdict 

For a West End show it cannot be faulted, and you’d have to be very stubborn not to enjoy it. But it is a poor reflection of the original story and failed to capture my affection in the same way. 

My church, Gateway Church Swindon, has called us all to a period of 40 days of corporate prayer and fasting, which has prompted me to really think about why we fast. I thought an appropriate place to start would be to take a look at what the Bible says about fasting. So here are a few thoughts:

A quick look through my NIV concordance showed the following verses mentioning fasts and fasting, as well as a few where a fast is inferred but not named: 

Judges 20:26 Then all the Israelites, the whole army, went up to Bethel, and there they sat weeping before the LORD. They fasted that day until evening and presented burnt offerings and fellowship offerings to the LORD.

1 Sam 7:6 When they had assembled at Mizpah, they drew water and poured it out before the LORD. On that day they fasted and there they confessed, “We have sinned against the LORD.” Now Samuel was serving as leader of Israel at Mizpah. 

1 Sam 31:13 Then they took their bones and buried them under a tamarisk tree at Jabesh, and they fasted seven days.

2 Sam 1:12 They mourned and wept and fasted till evening for Saul and his son Jonathan, and for the army of the LORD and for the nation of Israel, because they had fallen by the sword.

2 Sam 12:16 David pleaded with God for the child. He fasted and spent the nights lying in sackcloth on the ground.

2 Sam 12:21-23 His attendants asked him, “Why are you acting this way? While the child was alive, you fasted and wept, but now that the child is dead, you get up and eat!” He answered, “While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept. I thought, ‘Who knows? The LORD may be gracious to me and let the child live.’But now that he is dead, why should I go on fasting? Can I bring him back again? I will go to him, but he will not return to me.”

1 Kings 21:9 Proclaim a day of fasting and seat Naboth in a prominent place among the people.

1 Kings 21:27 When Ahab heard these words, he tore his clothes, put on sackcloth and fasted. He lay in sackcloth and went around meekly.

1 Kings 23:12 They proclaimed a fast and seated Naboth in a prominent place among the people.

1 Ch 10:11-12 When all the inhabitants of Jabesh Gilead heard what the Philistines had done to Saul, all their valiant men went and took the bodies of Saul and his sons and brought them to Jabesh. Then they buried their bones under the great tree in Jabesh, and they fasted seven days.

2 Chron 20:3 Alarmed, Jehoshaphat resolved to inquire of the LORD, and he proclaimed a fast for all Judah

Ezra 8:21-23 There, by the Ahava Canal, I proclaimed a fast, so that we might humble ourselves before our God and ask him for a safe journey for us and our children, with all our possessions. For I was ashamed to request of the king an escort of soldiers and horsemen to help us against the enemy on the road, because we had spoken to the king, saying The hand of our God is upon all those for good who seek Him, but His power and His wrath are against all those who forsake Him”. So we fasted and petitioned our God about this, and he answered our prayer.

Nehemiah 1:4 When I heard these things, I sat down and wept. For some days I mourned and fasted and prayed before the God of heaven.

 Nehemiah 9:1 On the twenty-fourth day of the same month, the Israelites gathered together, fasting and wearing sackcloth and putting dust on their heads.

 Esther 4:3 In every province to which the edict and order of the king came, there was great mourning among the Jews, with fasting, weeping and wailing. Many lay in sackcloth and ashes.

 Esther 4:16 “Go, gather together all the Jews who are in Susa, and fast for me. Do not eat or drink for three days, night or day. I and my attendants will fast as you do. When this is done, I will go to the king, even though it is against the law. And if I perish, I perish.”

 Esther 9: 30-31 And Mordecai sent letters to all the Jews in the 127 provinces of Xerxes’ kingdom—words of goodwill and assurance— 31 to establish these days of Purim at their designated times, as Mordecai the Jew and Queen Esther had decreed for them, and as they had established for themselves and their descendants in regard to their times of fasting and lamentation.

 Ps 35:13 Yet when they were ill, I put on sackcloth and humbled myself with fasting. When my prayers returned to me unanswered,

Ps 69:10 When I wept and chastened my soul with fasting, that became my reproach. 

Ps 109:24 My knees give way from fasting; my body is thin and gaunt.

Isaiah 58: 3-6 ‘Why have we fasted,’ they say, ‘and you have not seen it? Why have we humbled ourselves,   and you have not noticed?’ “Yet on the day of your fasting, you do as you please and exploit all your workers. Your fasting ends in quarreling and strife, and in striking each other with wicked fists. You cannot fast as you do today and expect your voice to be heard on high. Is this the kind of fast I have chosen, only a day for people to humble themselves?  Is it only for bowing one’s head like a reed and for lying in sackcloth and ashes? Is that what you call a fast, a day acceptable to the LORD? “Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke?

Jeremiah 14:12 Although they fast, I will not listen to their cry; though they offer burnt offerings and grain offerings, I will not accept them. Instead, I will destroy them with the sword, famine and plague.”

 Jeremiah 36:6-9 So you go to the house of the LORD on a day of fasting and read to the people from the scroll the words of the LORD that you wrote as I dictated. Read them to all the people of Judah who come in from their towns. Perhaps they will bring their petition before the LORD and will each turn from their wicked ways, for the anger and wrath pronounced against this people by the LORD are great.”     Baruch son of Neriah did everything Jeremiah the prophet told him to do; at the LORD’s temple he read the words of the LORD from the scroll. In the ninth month of the fifth year of Jehoiakim son of Josiah king of Judah, a time of fasting before the LORD was proclaimed for all the people in Jerusalem and those who had come from the towns of Judah. 

Dan 9:3 So I turned to the Lord God and pleaded with him in prayer and petition, in fasting, and in sackcloth and ashes.

Dan 10:2-3 At that time I, Daniel, mourned for three weeks. I ate no choice food; no meat or wine touched my lips; and I used no lotions at all until the three weeks were over.

Joel 1:14 Declare a holy fast; call a sacred assembly. Summon the elders and all who live in the land to the house of the LORD your God, and cry out to the LORD.

Joel 2:12 “Even now,” declares the LORD, “return to me with all your heart, with fasting and weeping and mourning.”

Joel 2:15 Blow the trumpet in Zion, declare a holy fast, call a sacred assembly.

Jonah 3:5 The Ninevites believed God. A fast was proclaimed, and all of them, from the greatest to the least, put on sackcloth.

Zec 7:2-5 The people of Bethel had sent Sharezer and Regem-Melek, together with their men, to entreat the LORD  by asking the priests of the house of the LORD Almighty and the prophets, “Should I mourn and fast in the fifth month, as I have done for so many years?”

 Then the word of the LORD Almighty came to me: “Ask all the people of the land and the priests, ‘When you fasted and mourned in the fifth and seventh months for the past seventy years, was it really for me that you fasted

Zec 8:19 This is what the LORD Almighty says: “The fasts of the fourth, fifth, seventh and tenth months will become joyful and glad occasions and happy festivals for Judah. Therefore love truth and peace.”

Matt 3:4 John’s clothes were made of camel’s hair, and he had a leather belt around his waist. His food was locusts and wild honey. 

Matt 4:1-2 Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. 2 After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry.

Matt 6:16-18 “When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show others they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face,  so that it will not be obvious to others that you are fasting, but only to your Father, who is unseen; and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

Matt 9:14-15 (the same story is told in Mark 2:18-19 and Luke 5:33-35) Then John’s disciples came and asked him, “How is it that we and the Pharisees fast often, but your disciples do not fast?”  Jesus answered, “How can the guests of the bridegroom mourn while he is with them? The time will come when the bridegroom will be taken from them; then they will fast.

Matt 17:14-21 When they came to the crowd, a man approached Jesus and knelt before him. “Lord, have mercy on my son,” he said. “He has seizures and is suffering greatly. He often falls into the fire or into the water. I brought him to your disciples, but they could not heal him.”    “You unbelieving and perverse generation,” Jesus replied, “how long shall I stay with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring the boy here to me.” Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed at that moment.Then the disciples came to Jesus in private and asked, “Why couldn’t we drive it out?”  He replied, “Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you. However, this kind does not go out except by prayer and fasting.”

Luke 2:36-38 There was also a prophet, Anna, the daughter of Penuel, of the tribe of Asher. She was very old; she had lived with her husband seven years after her marriage, and then was a widow until she was eighty-four. She never left the temple but worshiped night and day, fasting and praying.  Coming up to them at that very moment, she gave thanks to God and spoke about the child to all who were looking forward to the redemption of Jerusalem.

Luke 18:11-13 The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’

   “But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’

Acts 13:2-3 While they were worshiping the Lord and fasting, the Holy Spirit said, “Set apart for me Barnabas and Saul for the work to which I have called them.” So after they had fasted and prayed, they placed their hands on them and sent them off.

Acts 14:23 Paul and Barnabas appointed elders for them in each church and, with prayer and fasting, committed them to the Lord, in whom they had put their trust.

Acts 27:9 Much time had been lost, and sailing had already become dangerous because by now it was after the Day of Atonement (fast). 

 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 

There’s alot here, and I’m not going to try to pull everything out of this that is possible (afterall, there are whole books written on this subject!) But here are a few of the points that stand out to me:

fasting is God’s idea. He ordained fasts by instituting the Jewish festivals such as the Day of Atonement. (Acts 27:9) He also specifically instructed fasts at times (Joel 2:12). In addition the Judges and Prophets, who lead the people of Israel by bringing God’s word to them in prophecies, called the people to fasting many times. Even the people of Ninevah, who did not honour God, knew to fast when Jonah brought God’s judgement against them. 

fasting is linked with humility. See Psalm 35 and 69. Compare also 2 Chron 7:14, which doesn’t specifically mention fasting, but refers to ‘humble themselves’, which in the context of Psalms 35 & 69 has been read by some scholars to refer to fasting

fasting was an automatic response of believers when needing God’s intervention, deliverance, guidance or mercy.  For example Queen Esther fasting when faced with the impending genocide of the Jews; the Ninavites fasting when receiving Jonah’s prophecy of God’s condemnation of the nation; the disciples fasting for guidance as to who to lead churches; Paul calling the sailors to fast when faced with a storm; David fasting to plead with God for his son’s life; 

fasting is not a way to force God’s hand. The Isaiah passage makes it clear that God is concerned with the attitudes of our heart, and not just our physical actions. God did not heal David’s son despite his continued prayer and fasting. See also Luke 18:11-13

they saw results! fasting was frequently followed by the Holy Spirit’s power (read 2 Chron 20)

Jesus fasted. If Jesus did it - then maybe I should too

Corporate fasting appears to multiply the response. The bigger the situation the face - the more  people joining together to fast in unison of heart the better. See Esther, Jonah, Ezra, and Judges

So as I said - just a few thoughts. What other things do you notice from reading these verses? 

My church has called a corporate fast - it's asking all of its members to take part in 40 days of prayer and fasting. Why? What's the point? 

Maybe I'll just pray a bit. Maybe turn up to one or two mmetings. But really, so long as the elders as praying their socks off - it doesn't really matter if I'm part of it, does it? It's just that they're really in to this stuff, but I'm just your average day joe sort of Christian, they can't expect me to go without food! That's just religion, putting rules on me. I'm not falling for it. 

Perhaps that's how some people feel. Thankfully it's not my opinion! Here's an example of why:

"There is exponential release of power when we corporately harmonise our prayer and fasting for victoy. A few years ago, a precious family that had moved from Chile to be a part of our church experienced the victory that comes with this kind of corporate fasting. Their son, Michael, had just turned eight years old when his teachers reported noticing strange head movements during class. Hie parents began to observe him, and it quickly became evident that there was a problem and that it was getting worse. Michael's head jerked around as he watched television, his tongue flicked in and out, he blinked constantly, he would unconsciously point his middle finger at people, and he would grunt repeatedly, even in his sleep. The progression of the symptoms was alarming. 

Michael was diagnosed with Tourette's syndrome, a very serious nerve disorder. For the next four years he and his family struggled with this disease. Their Harvard-trainsed neurologist was able to control the condition with strong medication, but soon th emedication caused such severe side affects that Michael had difficulty even breathing. A gauntlet of other medications was just as unsuccessful in halting the progression and severity of his tics. By the end of the third year he had almost one tic per second. During this time, we prayed for Michael, and our local church body surrounded his family with love, offereing support and practical assistance. But the problem persisted, and his family was emotionally and physically worn down. 

In the fall, Michael was supposed to enter into sixth grade. The frequency of his tics had made it almost impossible for him to function in the classroom. His parents were contemplating pulling him out of school when I asked if we could put him at the top of our prayer list during a corporate 21-day fast. For three weeks our church fasted and asked God to intervene for Michael. Some people fasted the entire time. Others took turns for shorter periods. Soon after the end of the fast, Michael's parents noticed that he had not had any tics at the breakfast table. The last time they had counted his tics at a family meal, he had had 54 tics per minute. Now he seemed to have nothing. For day shtey kept looking for signs of the disorder , but there was never another tic. There had been no change in medication, no special treament, nothing but the fast. God had healed Michael. Michael has been completely well for several years now. He is a strong student, an excellent artist, an active soccer and basketball player, and a regular volunteer at our home church. We attribute his healing completely to hte Lord Jesus Christ and to power of corporate fasting."

[excerpt from The Hidden Power of Prayer and Fasting, by Mahesh Chavda]

I believe in the power of prayer, and in prayer and fasting. I believe in Chavda's premise - that there is exponential power in corporate prayer and fasting. That's why I'm excited to be part of the 40 days coming up in our church. I hope that many others are too. 

Just before Christmas I got myself in a bit of a funk. I had come back from Canada all fueled for pressing into God, and decided I would fast once a week until I started seeing some change in the depressing ‘waiting’ game we’ve been playing. But after a week or two of this, one day I just hit a wall. “What’s the point” I thought, “why do I bother fasting? Nothing every changes. What does it achieve?”

Haha. I’m so glad that not only does our heavenly Father deal with us with eternal patience and gentleness - but he also has a cracking sense of humour. 

Last January in one of our first small group sessions of the year I asked everyone to write a letter. It was either a letter to God or to themselves, about their prayers for the year. I collected all the letters, and held onto them until part way through December, when I posted them out to all involved in the exercise. I didn’t post my own letter, but just a week or so after this little grumble to God about his lack of actually responding to my earnest prayers and fasting I did open and read my letter. In it I had prayed for those big things on my heart which I was asking him for in the year to come.

I’d love to say that everyone of those prayers had been answered and fulfilled, but that’s not the case. But some of them had been - some pretty big prayers in fact. Gently God nudged me in the ribs - “I thought you said I never answer your prayers and there’s no point? Look at what I did last year!”

So I thought about this some more. How many times have I seen answers to prayer? How many times have I been witness to God at work, to miracles, even where I haven’t even prayed at all?! Thinking of miracles I know of from just the past 12 months I can name: 

• freedom from an eating disorder
• chronic long term back pain healed
• received healing myself of a back injury
• prayed for and seen knee injuries healed
• miraculous financial provision for friends facing crisis
• relationships restored which had seemed hopeless
• turnaround in a failing business
• partial healing of arthritis

And that’s just the beginning, the things I can remember! Excitingly in our church we’ve seen at least 14 people come to Christ and had more than 20 baptisms! These ranged from people who had only very recently heard of Christ, to those who had been prayed for by loved ones for decades. These salvations - they are the best miracles, and fill me with such joy, and hope for those I love. 

All this I have personally seen or experienced, in my own local church context, in just one year. In addition we’ve heard of further healings, and even a woman raised from death, in churches with which we have connection! And I dared to grumble to God that he never takes action! These were not the works of men - there’s not a Christian I know, whether church leader or layman, who has the power to raise from the dead or give healing to injured bodies. Only the power of the Creator of the universe brings life and wholeness. 

I have seen miracles. By God’s grace I have been part of miracles. I have a lifetime’s and more events to give thanks for. How great is my God! 

So, do I think prayer and fasting a waste of time? Not on your life. I know that God doesn’t need me to pray in order to force his hand or even bring to his attention the things that are on my mind - he’s fully aware of it all. But he loves to he me express my heart’s desire, loves to have me partner in him in longing for life and healing and miracles. I have reignited my excitement in praying and fasting, in joining in with God in the great work he’s about. 

In our church we’re about to start 40 days of prayer and fasting. I couldn’t wait till then, so have already begun praying and fasting. This morning as I was praying and reading my Bible I wrote in my prayer journal a list of all the things and people I am praying for. Miracles for my friends, for my small group, for my church, for my family and for my own and Steve’s lives. Miracles. That’s what I’m asking for, praying for, believing for - expecting. I’m so excited because I know I will start to be able to tick off that list one by one. Just like my 2011 prayer letter it may be that not all of the items will be answered in the 40 days - but I believe that all of them will be answered in God’s timing. I believe in miracles - and I’m not going to stop chasing them. 

Snuff is the latest Discworld novel from one of my favourite authors, Terry Pratchett. I’ve read all the Discworld books, starting from Sorcery when I was 10 and bored on a camping holiday. I love the books, and am in awe of Pratchett’s genius with words and humour.

Tragically though, his last few offerings have not been up to the standard I expect from him. Of course, he’s not long been diagnosed with the beginnings of Alzheimer’s. Perhaps in light of this I should be more charitable in my review - but what would be the point in that. The truth is, the past five or six Discworld books haven’t captivated me in the same way that the rest have (and Snuff is the 39th in the series). That being said, Pratchett is still a great writer, has an incredible wealth of knowledge stuffed into every offering, and can produce stories one million times better than anything I’d every manage!

So, to Snuff itself. Well, given that I haven’t enjoyed the last few, I was a bit apprehensive even starting the book. It centres around Commander Sam Vines, a regular and well-loved character. (In fact, the first book in which we meet Sam Vines - Guards! Guards! - is my all time favourite Discworld novel. Accept for when I love Reaper Man more...) Unfortunately, the book didn’t grip me. It took me four days to read this book - as a comparison, I usually take about 1 day, possibly 2, even on the books that I haven’t found to be as good as the rest.

It was a slow start, taking about a quarter of the book setting the scene before anything really interesting happened. The middle section did get going really well, culminating in a high speed boat chase in a storm (think of your high octane chase sequence in a Die Hard film, transferred to the written word, set on a planet in a different universe). That was the high point of the story.
Sadly after that it all kind of trailed. Where the past few offerings have suffered in that they’ve been a good, fast paced story that suddenly end quite abruptly, almost as if Pratchett runs out of steam and decides to just wrap everything up in a few pages, Snuff seemed to have the opposite effect - the end of the book seemed to last forever.

But my ultimate disappointment really would be the feel of the book. It was almost as if Pratchett was trying to be Pratchett. It read more like a Pratchett wannabe trying very hard to imitate his style, and in the trying hard just overdoing it. Where his stories are normally ver character based, with wonderful use of words to produce humour, interspersed with dramatic dialogue to give a sideways commentary on modern life - it felt like every joke was forced, and every other dialogue an in-depth political statement. You know how in a film there’ll be a tense scene, where the protagonist delivers a monologue of power and depth, probably with a dramatic score behind it, or even, to amp up the tension, to utter silence. Well, imagine a film where every single time the main character speaks you have that sort of tension... that’s how Snuff felt much of the time. After a while you cannot keep up that tension, and you just get a bit bored.

Finally, Snuff broke the mould. The one constant in all the Discworld novels has been the appearance of Death. Death is a character, he’s a 6ft skeleton in a black robe and speaks in CAPITAL LETTERS. He appears in every single book, if only in one or two short scenes (though in 3 or 4 of them he’s actually the central character). But in Snuff he doesn’t make an appearance. Unforgiveably there’s even a scene that seems almost created for him, and as I read it I began to feel relief, ah, here was Death at last - but he never came. It felt like someone had left the sugar out while making the cake. It’s just not right!I keep reading the Discworld books, and after each disappointment vowing not to read any more. But when a new book comes out, I inevitably will. Because I know the world, and the characters so well, and it would be sad for there to be an adventure of theirs that I didn’t know. But I have to reluctantly accept that the hey day is over.

In the past few years family history has gained in popularity. Whether it started with the hit show “Who Do You Think You Are?” where celebrities trace through their ancestry, or if the show simply built on a popularity that was growing already, I don’t know. But it seems to be the latest hobby. 

With the advent of the Internet allowing information to be shared so easily, hunting down your family has never been easier - although that doesn’t mean it’s ‘easy’ - as each family slowly shares their family tree then the body of information is being built up, but there’s still alot information missing which can only be found by trailing through old church records or family photograph albums. 

My mum has been researching into our family history. Along the way she’s made great discoveries. Some of the names we’ve turned up especially have made me smile - my favourite being Ellen Lello! We were surprised when she discovered that a certain branch of our ancestry - the Hailstones - hailed from villages surrounding Swindon! Last summer I spent a day with my parents doing a grave-yard crawl (not quite as fun as fun as a pub crawl!), searching headstones for any record of our family. We did find a war memorial in Pewsey with an Edward Hailstone mentioned - though I haven’t heard yet from my mum whether he was ‘one of ours’.

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Some family branches have been harder to research than others. Both my dad’s parents passed away while he was still a young boy, and we have very little information about his mother. We have one or two photos, and I know her name was Gladys Lillian - but that’s about it. So I was thrilled when I heard from my dad yesterday that they have made a breakthrough. My mum has been putting the information she has found onto an internet genealogy site - and through the site she’s been contacting by a cousin of my dad we didn’t know he had! 

So Gladys had a brother, who married twice. He had 4 children by his first wife, and 5 by his second. One of these cousins has also been putting together her family history and so found my mum’s information matched with hers! Not only does my dad have 9 new cousins - but also Dad’s uncle’s second wife is still alive! She’s in her nineties, and probably wont have any memory of Gladys, but we’re hoping there might be a couple of new photos of my Grandmother! 

It’s thoroughly exciting, and I can’t wait to hear what other new treasures my mum unearths! 

A few days after Christmas one year I learnt how dangerous it is to spend too much time in your own head. 

My mum asked me to hoover the house. When I got to hoovering under the tree I spent ages hoovering up all the pine needles. While I was doing it, I was enjoying daydreaming, indulging my imagination. In fact I was enjoying it so much, that I didn’t want to stop, so every time I got near to finishing I would bump the Christmas tree again so that more needles would drop off.

Ok, so I know that sounds crazy. But wait for it - what’s more crazy is that I hoovered for so long that I didn't notice the vacuum cleaner was overheating, until he casing actually melted...!

One Christmas my elder sister went searching through the house, and found Santa’s presents for the three of us stashed under my parents’ bed. 

In her excitement, she decided to share her discovery with her sisters. She happily led us into the bedroom and pulled out each gift one by one to show us what we’d be getting in a few days time. 

The biggest surprise was on Christmas morning when we began to open our gifts. Ann may have found the gifts - but she didn’t guess right which gift was for whom. Not only did we have to pretend to be surprised as we opened each gift - we also had to not show surprise when gifts we thought were ours were opened up by someone else...

Sometimes I’m tempted to turn mute. I figure, if I don’t say anything at all then I can’t put my foot in it; I can’t say the wrong thing, and no-one can misinterpret what I say.

Or perhaps I could go live in a cave as a hermit, in total isolation from the world. That seems about the only way to prevent misunderstandings in relationships. Because, sometimes, it feels that no matter what I say or do or think - someone, somewhere is going to get upset.

It’s funny really. Being so aware at how easy it is for people to get the wrong idea or to hear something that you’re not actually saying, I do try so very very hard to be careful with my words. I try to only say what I really mean, and make sure that I don’t let my emotions take over, knowing how easy it is to let your words get away with you when you’re upset or tired. I’ll often hold back from saying anything at all, if I’m not sure I can phrase it in a way that will bring understanding. And yet, still, misunderstandings occur. I think I’ve come to accept that being careful can only achieve so much! Communicating is a minefield!

But, whenever I do get tempted to turn mute, after yet again feeling like I can’t say the right thing for getting it wrong, I remember this - that non-communication does not equal lack of communication. Silence doesn’t mean that people haven’t heard something. Instead - if you don’t say anything, the other person is bound to fill in your side of the conversation for themselves, usually by just guessing. Some people will guess optimistically, others pessimistically. I’m the type of person who’l always fill in the silence with the worst possible explanation. “They haven’t responded to an email - they’re annoyed that you’ve asked, or irritated that you’ve bothered them...”. that sort of thing.

No, non-communication won’t solve the problem. Even with silence I’d still end up ‘saying’ the wrong thing! And, realistically, I know that I could never go mute - I enjoy talking too much (just ask Steve!) No, the hermit’s life is not for me. So I’ll just have to keep trying hard not to upset anyone, and hope that you’ll give me the benefit of the doubt. And if I do say the wrong thing, please forgive me. I’m trying hard - honest!!